Wake up, Egbert.-
You wearily open your eyes, blinking as they adjust to the morning light flooding in through your window. As you come to your senses, you realize something very human is currently holding you, their chin resting on your shoulder. Not even turning your head, you know its Dave. You closed your eyes, trying to remember what the past night’s dream was. Maybe that’s why he was here. A menagerie of dead Daves flashed before you, and you involuntarily shuddered and opened your eyes again. A nightmare. You must have been screaming (as usual), and woken him up. It made you smile to know he came to help you.
Reveling in the comfort of his touch, you stayed in bed for a little bit longer. That is, you stayed in bed until you saw the snow falling outside, and then you promptly untangled yourself from Dave and ran over to see just how much had fallen. You were oblivious to the groans of the coolkid behind you as you gave a whoop of joy and thought of a million ways to bombard Dave with copious amounts of snow. As you hunted through your closet for a proper jacket (stupid coolkids not coming prepared!) he finally woke up.
“Jegus fuck, Egbert,” he said, rubbing his eyes under his sunglasses. “What is your deal?”
“It snowed!” you chirped back excitedly, holding up a white fluffy winter coat that your dad had gotten for you to replace the slightly worn out blue one you had. White wasn’t your thing, though, and your blue one was just fine, so this one wasn’t worn. “I’m going to introduce you to the joys of winter in Washington!”
“Please, please don’t tell me you’re going to make me wear that white monstrosity.” You swear he almost paled at the thought, and it brought forth a snicker from you. “Seriously, John. That thing should be a crime.”
Rolling your eyes, you hung it on the doorknob for later. “You’ll freeze if you don’t. And I don’t care what you say,” cutting him off before he could protest, “we are going outside.”
He muttered a simple ‘Fuck you’ under his breath, and you chuckled. You had barely closed the closet door when a pair of hands suddenly grabbed you from behind and threw you to the ground, pinning you in an instant. Dave was on top of you, smirking. Damn, how had he moved that fast? You didn’t have any time to react!
“Not fair, Dave!” you cried out, squirming a bit, which only made him tighten his grip and smirk wider. “I didn’t even hear you coming! We don’t all have ninja skills like you!”
His voice was low and smooth, and it made you shiver a bit. “All is fair in love and war, Egbert.” When he brought his face slightly closer to yours, your brain finally registered just how close Dave was. It also noted how you were only in your boxers. Oh God, your face was probably bright red by now.
“Look at the blushing bride,” he teased, tracing your jaw with his fingertip, making your pulse race.
“Sh-shut up.” Shit, that was absolutely pathetic. Your manly pride just took a fucking nosedive. You guess it wasn’t too bad, though, being humiliated like this. Especially when he started kissing you. Yeah, it was definitely worth the sloppy makeouts.
You’re not sure how long you two had been kissing before you had to begrudgingly break off. “Dave?”
“Mmm?” He raised his eyebrows.
“I have to go to the bathroom. Really bad.”
He sighed and stood up, helping you to your feet. Going over to your dresser, you quickly grabbed out a shirt and ran to the door. “I’ll be back!” you threw over your shoulder, and then you were off.
You nearly lost your shit the moment he left. That mistake was just absolutely STUPID, you know he hadn’t noticed but GOD was it just plain DUMB. ‘It was totally worth it,’ a part of your brain whispered, and you shot it dead with a simple ‘NO’ for the time being. Nothing was worth uncovering the Strider family secret. Absolutely nothing. You had promised Bro you would never, ever flashstep outside the confines of your apartment.
‘Shit would scare civilians,’ he had put simply, shrugging his shoulders. ‘Being able to move across a room in a single, invisible instant isn’t really something people call normal.’ You completely agreed with that statement, and from that moment on your swore on Lil Cal’s fist bump that you would never exhibit your skills out in public.
And boy, just look at you upholding that promise. Flashstepping in your best bro’s room for the most asinine reason. Just to pin him to the ground over a petty winter jacket. Okay, maybe that was worth it, seeing as how you got some pretty damn sweet sloppy makeouts out of the whole ordeal. But that wasn’t the point. The point was that you had screwed up, and you were going to have to explain it to John sooner or later.
The click of the door opening brought you out of your reverie, and you assumed your natural pokerface. John was now wearing a much too large Midnight crew shirt that, much to your internal chagrin, covered up sufficient parts of his torso and legs. “C’mon, Dave! My dad’s making pancakes! Fluffy buttery goodness waits for no man.”
“Alright, I’m right behind you, bro.” You followed John back down to the dining room, where more food than you knew what to do with assaulted your eyes. Bacon, eggs, and holy shit were those pancakes just for the three of you?? How John stayed so twiggy would forever be a mystery for you. You sat down, and your stomach growled in anticipation.
Then the beast within was sated, soothed by fluffy buttery goodness (godammit Egbert you made it so catchy) and the satisfaction of a tasty breakfast. John ran upstairs like an excited little bunny, saying something about ‘getting ready for the snow,’ and you chuckled, staying behind and letting your stomach rest. You were at peace.
“You really do care for John, don’t you?”
The juice you were currently sipping nearly came out of your nose. “W-What?” you sputtered, your peace flipping you off as it flew out the nearest window.
John’s father chuckled, obviously enjoying the rise he got out of you. Damn Egberts and their Prankster Gambits. “I’m not a blind man. I saw you were able to comfort my son last night. Not even I have been able to calm him when he gets like that.
You ninja skills stat took a hit. Looks like you didn’t watch your back closely enough. However, that didn’t stop something deep inside you from glowing. To know that you could reach John in a way that no one else could was something you treasured, even if you wouldn’t let on about it.
“So, Mr. Strider, after discussing with your brother...”
Oh gog jegus he had already talked to Bro about this?
“After this week, you can decide if you want to stay here.”
Did he just say stay?
Your brain did a triple backflip off the fucking handle.
-Let’s go back to Egderp!-
When Dave walked by you, he seemed to be in a lifeless stupor. You were happy he was going to get ready and all, but he was acting really strange! When you asked your Dad why, he claimed he didn’t think Dave was acting weird at all. Huh. Must have just been your imagination. You went into the living room, fully outfitted in your winter jacket, jeans, and boots, and waited for Dave to change.
He came back downstairs a few moments later, actually wearing the white jacket. Gasping in mock terror, you pretended to hide behind your couch. “Who is this stranger that has taken Dave Strider’s place?”
With an eye roll, he flipped you the bird. “Curiosity slayed the cool cat inside of me.”
“Can’t say that I mind too much!” Holding out your blue-gloved hands, you wiggled your fingers. “Got your gloves?”
Holy shit, he actually mimicked you back. “I’ve got them, Egbert. They’re too white and pristine for my tastes, but whatever.”
“We’re all good to go, then!” You temporarily stuck your head into the dining room. “Dad, me and Dave are leaving now!”
“Have fun, boys,” was the last thing you heard from your Dad before you dragged Dave out into the crisp, cool winter air.
The effect on Dave was nigh instantaneous. “Holy fucking shit Egbert, it’s as cold as the motherfucking north pole out here.” He wrapped his arms around his body, trying to regain warmth as the two of you started to walk.
This time, it was your turn to roll your eyes. “It’s not that bad, Dave! It’ll just take you a bit to get used to it,” you reassured him, unwrapping his arms and taking one of his hands. “It won’t really matter once we’ve started running around anyways.” Miraculously, he stayed quiet, and you two walked the block to the park.
You didn’t know Dave Strider could throw a snowball so well.
He had this crazy aim (ninja skills my ass, this is unnatural), and a way of packing snowballs just right so that every time they hit you, you swear they made a bruise on impact. After getting a sincere pounding, you laughed, throwing your hands in the air. “Mercy, mercy!” you cried, dropping the snowballs that you had in your hands.
“Striders show no mercy,” he dead panned, and struck you again.
Faking your death, you fell to the ground, throwing a hand across your forehead. “Oh, I am slain! Such a cruel, cruel world.”
This made Strider chuckle a bit. You loved his laugh, it’s smooth, low monotone. “Come on now Egbert. You are much too strong just to be killed by a tiny fucking snowball.”
“I was weak! I cried out for mercy!”
“Oh, for fucks sake. Do I need to kiss you back to life or something?”
Oh, this opportunity was just too good to pass up. “If I am to live, I require the kiss of life!” you chirped in a high falsetto, snickering a bit.
“Of course, my little princess.” Rolling his eyes, he knelt down beside you, giving you a gentlemanly peck on the lips.
Now you sat up, leaning into his arms, talking in a falsetto once again. “Oh, my prince! I have been saved!”
The giggle of a little girl bounced across the clearing, and both of your heads snapped her way. She was jumping up and down, clapping her hands together, a look of pure delight on her face. “Look mommy, look! A happy endin’!”
Her mother smiled warmly. “A happy ending indeed.”
“You have to carry him away now, Mister Prince!” the little girl called out, and you looked up to Dave, who had a hint of a smile on his face.
“You okay with me picking you up, bro?” he asked quietly, trying to play along.
“Yeah,” you said, grinning widely. He scooped you up, princess style, and started to walk away, the little girl squealing behind the two of you.
“You just want to go home, princess Egbert?” he asked, unable to hold back a smile. “Bet the little girl would be tickled fucking pink to see me carry you home and deliver you at your doorstep.”
“Take me home, my sweet prince,” you said with a chuckle, wrapping your arms around his neck, settling your head on his chest, just above his heart. You listened to his heartbeat as he carried you home, a derpy smile on your face.
You won’t ever, ever get used to this.
Fuck the pokerface. The way you felt right now couldn’t be masked by something so simple. The joy of carrying John Egbert in your arms was boundless, absolutely boundless. Something within your head asked when you had turned into such a fucking sap and to man the fuck up, but you shooshed it. Only love now. Only love.
The squeals of the little girl rang towards you when you nudged open the door to John’s house. Jegus, little girls sure had a fucking pair of lungs. You decided that was okay, though, when John’s derpy smile turned into a grin. Starting to walk calmly across the room, you saw John’s dad start to walk through the kitchen…
…and you, in a sheer panic, decided to flashstep your ass all the way to John’s room.
You were in your living room, and then you weren’t.
This kind of stuff was supposed to be impossible, wasn’t it?
Oh my dear gog.
You were pretty sure that John was in a state of shock right now, by the way he had a death grip on your neck and all he could say was ‘um’ over and over again. Sighing, you laid him down on his bed, knowing that you had some explaining to do. He just laid there, staring up at you with wide, blue, innocent eyes, and you could see the gears turning as he tried to process what just happened. In the meantime, you took off your jacket, and he, after a few stunned seconds, did the same.
It took a few minutes for him to finally speak. “Umm, Dave?”
“Yeah?” you casually replied, trying to retain a cool demeanor.
“How did you… you know…” He wiggled his hands, trying to make a point.
“How did I move that fast?” you finished for him, and he nodded. “It’s called flashstepping.”
“Flashstepping?” His eyebrows hit the ceiling.
“Yeah, it’s a Strider thing,” you said with a shrug. “We can walk a bit faster than other people can.”
“Huh,” he breathed, and you couldn’t help but note the wonder in his voice. “So earlier today, when you pinned me to the ground… you were flashstepping?”
He grinned this sly little grin, and it did funny things to your heartbeat. “Would you be willing to do that some more later tonight?”
You sure as hell weren’t going to say no.
Sloppy makeouts before bed? Best. Thing. Ever.
Post makeout cuddles? Even better.
Then, he whispers in your ear, “Want me to stay?”
You look up into his bright red eyes, and smile.
And you, John Egbert, fall asleep in the arms of the boy you love.